Gypsy

Today is my son's birthday, so to honor him I am going to take a little trip down memory lane with the help of Suzanne Vega.

About a week ago my daughter was looking around through my husband and I's CD's. She happened upon Suzanne Vega's "Solitude Standing". She put it in the CD player and within one minute I was taken back to our tiny, one bedroom apartment in the Bronx. We were living there for three years while my husband completed a medical residency in emergency medicine. Within a few months of arriving in New York in June of 1999, I found myself pregnant with our first child.

When our son was born in 2000 my husband was in his 3rd year of residency which basically meant he was gone a lot working and when he was home he needed to spend a fair amount of time with all the academic stuff. All this to say I was by myself frequently with a new baby, no extended family around and add to the mix the fact that I was incredibly sleep deprived. Oh, and did I mention our son did not sleep well? In fact, given his lack of sleeping through the night during his entire 1st year of life I am amazed at how well he sleeps now.

Most nights would find me rocking him to sleep only to have him wake up when I would attempt to lay him down in his crib. The cycle would then repeat itself.

He liked music though and in particular Suzanne Vega. I can not tell you how many nights I held him in my arms swaying around our living room listening to the song "Gypsy" over and over again until at last he would fall deeply asleep and I would lay him down in his bed and collapse in mine.

The words are beautiful and haunting and somehow summed up so many of the emotions I felt during that new and scary transition to motherhood. I will forever think of him every time I hear that song.

So, Happy 8th Birthday son. I love you so much.