Mary Jane

Three years ago today marks the day my sweet grandma, one of the most influential people in my life, lost her battle with breast cancer and went home to heaven. She lived to see my mom and cousin turn a year older on the 25th. She lived to see my son Pete turn one on the 26th. Then she went home to live with Jesus forever on the 27th.

To say I am emotional about it, even three years later is an understatement.

I am so grateful we were living in Ohio for the last three years of her life. In fact, we lived just a few miles away. We talked on the phone almost daily and even though she was battling cancer and I had three kids ages 4, 2 and a newborn, we still managed to get together for dinner or lunch almost every week for the last year she was alive.

I remember the day she died clearly.
Early morning phone call from my mom.
Crying.
The flock of birds above my house.

That last one I need to explain. I hesitated to even include this part of the story for fear ya'll will think I am crazy, but it happened and it is part of it all. After I got off the phone with my mom telling me that grandma had died, one of the first things I heard through my tears was birds. I know that may not strike you as odd, lots of people hear birds outside their windows each day, but, we were living in my hometown in Ohio at the time and the neighborhood we lived in was a very new subdivision. Not a lot of trees around and the trees that were there were skinny and small. Seeing a bird, not unusual, hearing a flock of birds as they flew south, not unusual. Hearing a flock of birds flying just above my house without them flying away, unusual. All morning long in my grief I heard those crazy birds flying above my house until it finally hit me, "Oh, this must be a God thing!"

I believe in my whole heart that God sent those birds to fly above my house, maybe even designed a detour as they were heading south for the winter, for as long as it took for me to get the message...Grandma was flying free. (OK, I have to stop myself from yelling, "Free bird!" right now as it might, just might interrupt the mood of this all) The message was clear... no more pain, no more suffering. My grandma was complete and whole the minute she stopped breathing as only someone in Christ can be. She was as free as those birds.

And this girl in Ohio needed to know that. I needed to be reminded that because grandma was ok, I was going to be ok too.

Even though at that moment I could not imagine it.

Could not imagine the holidays coming up without her there. Could not imagine moving to Texas in a few months without here being there to see us go. Could not imagine a lot of things without her.

But I knew I was going to be okay.

I noticed those crazy birds flying above our house for the next several mornings. In fact, the first day I noticed the birds were gone was the morning after her burial.

Pretty appropriate, I think.

There are so many things I could write about her, but I decided to honor her by posting one of my favorite recipes of grandma's. It is a recipe for a homemade chocolate cake with homemade caramel icing. I used to request it for my birthday or special dinners. Boy could she cook and bake. I will probably never make homemade noodles quite like her or this caramel sauce as perfect and creamy as hers. But I will keep trying. In fact, one of my most favorite things I have of grandma's (along with a chocolate cardigan she wore and one of her nightgowns) is a copy, in her own writing, of all her recipes.

Pretty priceless, I would say.

Hope you enjoy the recipe. It's one she had written out for someone. I am going to include it just the way I have it with her comments and everything.

Take care,
Julie


Easy Chocolate Cake
2 cups sugar
3 cups flour Sift these together
6 TAB. cocoa
1 tea. salt
2 tea. soda

Add 1 cup oil (I use canola)
2 tea. vanila
2 Tab. vinegar
2 cups cold water

*Use a fork and stir till smooth. Bake in 9x13 pan at 350 for 30 minutes

Caramel Icing
2 cups brown sugar (packed down)
1/2 cup milk
about 1/2 to 3/4 stick of margarine or butter

*Stir up good and cook one minute after coming to a complete boil. Beat till it begins to get a little sugary look. I take a fork and punch holes all over top of cake and spread some of the icing over cake and let it run down in the cake. Just use a thin layer of the icing. Keep beating it with a spoon till it gets the sugary look. Then spread the rest of it on the cake. You have to watch as it can go to sugar fast. The main thing is not to cook it over the 1 minute. I usually cook it 1 min.+ 15 seconds.
Good luck , (grandma had a smiley face here :)
Mary Jane

You can always add powdered sugar to icing if it just won't go to sugar for you.

Happy Birthday Baby!

My baby turns 4 today. Four. I can't believe it. We've been talking about this day for a long time and counting down the days until it arrived, but it still seems to catch me by surprise.

My little guy is growing up.

In all honesty though, "little" is not a good word to describe him. He's been big since the get go. He weighed ten pounds and two ounces at birth.

Yes, you read that right. 10lb. 2 oz. Born naturally and he never even got to wear newborn diapers. That just doesn't seem right.

Big. Big in his size, big in personality, big heart, all boy and full of life.

The other day he got a birthday package from my older sister in Ohio. I kid you not, his hands were shaking with pure excitement as he tried to open the gifts. With each gift he opened he stood up and shouted, "It's exactly what I wanted!" Kind of makes you want to give a kid like that the world.

Lately he has been into playing Candyland. We probably play about 4-6 times a day. Whenever he wins (which happens almost every time and I swear I do not rig the cards) he wants me to shout, "Give it up for Pete!" and then start clapping wildly. He thinks it's absolutely hilarious. It really gets him going if I pretend I can't stop clapping, as in "Oh no! Pete, I can't stop clapping! AAHH!!" Lots of laughs. (By the way, here's how you can tell if someone is a dear friend or not. Remember the other day when I taught in my daughter's Kindergarten class? Pete when over to my dear friend Yvonne's house for the day. She knows all about his love for Candyland and while he was there they played several games of CandyLand. Pete had her doing the whole "Give it up for Pete!" and clapping wildly for him. I'd say that's a good friend!)

He is confident and happy. Loves school and doesn't even look back when I drop him off. I have to find him to give him a kiss good-bye.

When he was a baby I used to sing him the chorus from one of my favorite artists, Chris Rice. It was on his Amusing cd. The chorus went something like, "and to our dreams we'll gladly go and see you in the morning. You are the light you are the proof the Lord looks down and warms my roof. You are the light you are the sign that I am loved and life is mine." I can't think of that song without remembering my baby.

So, let's, "Give it up for Pete!" today.

Happy birthday baby. Mommy loves you.

Take care,

Julie

Some Random Thoughts

Hey there!

Just wanted to say "Hi!" Hope you all are doing well. I'm taking a break from Friday's Favorites tomorrow because a special someone in my family has a birthday. It's not me, but you'll have to come back on Friday and see!

By the way, Mom, if you are reading this today, "Happy Birthday!" I'll be calling you soon!

Have a great day and I'll talk to you all tomorrow.

Take care,
Julie

"Just the good 'ol boys..."

Earlier in the summer at lunch one day my oldest child asked me if we could super glue our Volkswagen van's doors shut and start climbing in the windows like the Dukes of Hazzard. The other kids quickly chimed in, "Please,mom, please!"

I paused a while before answering them so I could choose just one of the many reasons floating through my mind as to why that would not work for us.

I said,"Do you see how high up the windows are on our van? You would need a step ladder just to even reach the windows and that would seriously take away from the Dukes of Hazzard effect you are wanting to create. I mean, did you ever see Bo or Luke Duke climb up on a step ladder to get into the General Lee?"

They thought about that for a while.

Finally my oldest said, "No, I guess not."

"Besides" I added, "the Dukes of Hazzards car was closer to the ground, that's why they could just hop on in."

Then one of them came up with the idea that maybe they could ride in their grandma's convertible next time we were in Iowa.

There we go, problem solved I thought until my daughter told me she liked the girl from the Dukes of Hazzard.

"You mean Daisy Duke?" I asked her.

"Yes." She replied.

Now we have a completely different problem to deal with.

Parenting Phenomenons

Ever since I became a mom I have noticed certain things that occur repeatedly in our household. I refer to them as "phenomenons". I want to share them with you. See if any of these ring true in your home.

1. Why is it that my kids are always starving after I tell them it is time to go to bed?

2. I have noticed the number of shampoo bottles we go through is definately not in proportion to the number of kids we have. I am not sure how a child can manage to use half a bottle of shampoo while washing ones hair.

3. When I am talking on the phone it is like a honing device has gone off in their head saying, "Find mom. Bug mom. No matter what, DO NOT STOP!!!"

4. Why do my kids announce every toot (or for that matter any bodily function) like it is a national event? Is this really necessary?

5. For the life of me I can not understand the commercial choices on some of the kids TV channels. Things like, shampoo for women, miracle plant waterer and mighty putty which can, in my daughters words, "pull a huge, huge, huge, huge truck and can hold anything." I don't need my kids coming up to me asking me if I want beautiful, silky hair like the woman on TV.

6. I have noticed my youngest child has an uncanny ability to put his clothes on backwards about 99% of the time, even his underwear.

7. My kids sudden inability to walk or use their arms when it is time to pick up the house at night, or go upstairs to bed. Very uncanny I would say.

What about you? Any parenting phenomenons around your house? I would love to hear them.
Take care,
Julie

Have you seen the movie, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"?

Saturday night I finally got around to watching a movie I have wanted to see for a while, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly".

Have you seen it?

It is a film based on the memoir, "Le Scaphandre et le papillon" by Jean-Dominique Bauby. The author was the editor of Elle who suffered a stroke, went into a coma for 20 days and when he came out of the coma was unable to move, talk or do anything except blink one eye. His mind, sight and hearing were intact. He was diagnosed with what is called "Locked-in Syndrome". The therapist who worked with him came up with a code where Jean-Do (what his friends called him) would blink at the letter he wanted when the therapist went through the alphabet. He was able to communicate this way and eventually wrote the book I mentioned above, which is translated, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly: A memoir of Life in Death".

The movie is based on this book, although not without controversy. His closest friends say that the movie is not entirely accurate. Some issues are minor...he had two kids in real life, the movie shows him having three, but some issues are bigger. I do not want to give away any of the story line, so let's just say you can read about the controversy here.

I loved the film. It was beautiful to watch and I walked away from it re-affirming life. How can I complain about my life when here is someone who can only blink one eye, yet he's publishing a book?! I have no excuse to not be productive with my life. On those days when I feel down or discouraged about my life I want to choose to be grateful and thankful for all that God has blessed me with, and focus on the good instead of all the negative.

I'm planning on checking out the book this week and reading it. It reminded me of another life-inspiring story...Dick and Rick Hoyt, the father and son team who have completed Iron Man Triathalons together. The son, Rick, has cerebral palsy so the dad pulls a boat with his son on it for the swim, pedals for him during the bike ride and pushes him in a wheel chair for the run. You can watch a video about them on You Tube but I do not know how to include it in a post. (If you do know, please enlighten me and open up new worlds for me to explore in the world of blog posting!)

Hope you have a great week. Go live a great life and do good things.
Take care,
Julie

Friday's Favorites #5

Lately I have seen a lot of blogs posting their fall reading list or their favorite books from the summer. Now that it is a comfortable 80 out as I am writing, I thought I would go with that theme for this week's Friday's Favorites. If you are new to this blog you can read all about Friday's Favorites here.

I picked four of my favorite books to highlight. Some have been a favorite for years, others have become a favorite recently. I have to say, some of the books have things I don't agree with, one of the books disturbed me, but they all made me think and in that respect earned a spot as a favorite.

My first book is a recent favorite, "The Shack". In fact, it was the topic of my last Friday's Favorite. I won't spend a lot of time re-saying the same things. You can read what I wrote about it here.

One of my favorite authors is Donald Miller. His most popular book he's written thus far is "Blue Like Jazz." I liked the book, but the book he wrote that I want to mention is "Searching For God Knows What". It is just great. Here's a quote from the book, (on page ix) ...

"Sometimes I feel as though I were born in a circus, come out of my mother's womb like a man from a cannon, pitched toward the ceiling of the tent, all the doctors and nurses clapping in delight from the grandstands, the band going great guns in trombones and drums. I unfold and find flight hundreds of feet above the center ring, the smell of popcorn in the air, the clowns gather below, amazed at my grace, and all the people chanting my name as my arms come out like wings and I move swan-like toward the apex, where I draw my arms in, collapse my torso to my legs, roll over in perfection, then slowly give in to gravity. My body falls back toward earth, the ground coming up quick, the center ring growing enormous beneath my falling weight.

And this is precisely when it occurs to me that there is no net. And I wonder, 'what is the use of a circus?' and 'why should a man bother to be shot out of a cannon?' and 'why is the crowd's applause so fleeting? amd...'who is going to rescue me?' "


Next on my favorite's list is a book called, "A Severe Mercy" by Sheldon VanAuken. It's a love story but it also is the story of the author's conversion to Christianity through his friendship with C.S. Lewis. It's beautifully written and it's been my favorite book since I first read it in college.

Two other books I like are "Jesus Land" by Julia Scheeres. This is the pretty disturbing one, although its written well and riveting. The author grew up in a Christian family in Indiana with two adopted african american brothers, a cold and abusive physician father and an even more distant mother. It's heartbreaking.

The other book I read through as quickly as possible was, "Into Thin Air" by Jon Krakauer. This is the author's version of what happened on that fateful Mt. Everest expedition the author was on in 1996 that took the lives of many. Jon Krakauer has written other great books like, "Into the Wild". I saw a book of his the other day that I thought I'd like to read. I can't remember the title but it involves a cult.

A couple of other books I would like to read this fall are:
"What's so amazing about grace?" by Philip Yancey
"A long way gone" by Ishmael Beah
"Persuasion" by Jane Austen


What about you? Any book you hope to read this fall? Let me know.
Take care,
Julie